This poem just made me laugh out loud on this lazy afternoon. So I am quoting it here for you dear dryad.

WARNING

by Jenny Joseph

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick flowers in other people's gardens
And learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

SLAM BAM THANK YOU MA'AM!

Result of late night chats between madgirl and sacredsprites



O, my head feels so heavy
and my brain is so numb.
I cannot answer in class
and the teacher thinks I'm dumb.

O, I slept but only 10 hours last night,
and I ate but only twenny plates o'rice.
O, my brain craves for food and rest
and that my friends, is my lil' vice.

Sir, I know you are teaching well,
But the guy next to me is starting to smell!
The AC is sending shivers down my spine,
Menander, I feel, is way past his prime!!

O sir,I'm afraid you are wasting your time

For to Menander I don't give a dime.

I has me word!

A dash of salt
A little vinegar
A slice of tomato
A hint of sugar
Cool lemonade sloshes inside my soul
Let the flavours soak in and make me whole!
A word aside to our heavenly Mother
Patroness of food and protector of the liver
Let no mortal say, 'no more no more'
We might grow fat but out with such bores!
Who ever grew fat on cakes and meat loafs??
Eat well, make merry and exercise..loads!
This poem might not be a masterpiece
Well, dryad my mate, what do you make of this?!